Failed Existence quest

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The Failed Existence quest sees you fighting Irina for the Unobtainable Beauties. The quest leader is Gruff Co-Worker.

Warning: Parts of this quest and role may be disturbing to some players. Amy Bluescreenofdeath, the creator of Slash'EM Extended (currently the only NetHack variant featuring this role/quest), explicitly states that she doesn't mean to step on anybody's toes with the addition of this role, and doesn't try to condone, endorse or encourage anyone or anything related to this quest. This especially means the ongoing conflict between topmodels, transvestites and activists in this quest - it is purely fictional, and members of these groups aren't supposed to fight each other in real life. Slash'EM Extended is just a video game, not real life, and this quest doesn't resemble any real-life circumstances. Players who are feeling uneasy about this quest are advised to play other roles instead.

Gruff Co-Worker, the quest leader, is also one of the most obnoxious NPCs in the entire game. By comparison, the Master of Thieves is the nicest person on the planet. Also, Irina, despite being the quest nemesis, is much more polite than the quest leader.

Maps

Home level: Red Carpet

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The player arrives somewhere on the upper left corner of the map, and needs to make their way inside the complex to reach Gruff Co-Worker, the quest leader. Several models are walking around too. Despite being the quest friendlies, they start out hostile, and killing them is a Bad Idea. Chatting to them makes them utter maledictions. This level also has undead activistors and undead feat masters, and several dozen random ; that may attempt to drown the player. Gruff Co-Worker starts out hostile; he will attack the player on sight, and the only way to even see the actual quest dialogue is to pacify him, e.g. with the spell of charm monster.

This level is no-teleport, undiggable, and has lethe waters.

Upper filler levels: Wilderness Safari

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Stairs are placed randomly on this level. Random monsters are two undead activistors, an undead feat master, 3 random @, 10 random ;, 15 random q, 2 random d, 2 random f, a random c, 5 random n, 5 random m, 3 random p, 2 random r, 3 random s, a random t, 2 random u, 2 random w, 5 random z, a random B, 2 random C, a random N, 3 random S, 2 random Y and 5 random : placed anywhere on the map. All of them start out hostile, even if they are coaligned unicorns.

Additionally, there are 50 boulders, 50 piles of rocks and 10 random gems scattered around the level, and 10 random traps are placed as well. This level has undiggable floors and lethe water.

Locate level: Grand Canyon

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The upstairs will be in the left half of the level while the downstairs is on the right; their exact locations are random. There's a hostile heavy weapon dude named Breaker on the spot marked @, who starts out asleep. Also, there are at least 40 random ;, 20 random B, 4 undead feat masters, 2 undead activistors, 5 random @, 15 random n, 5 umber hulks and 2 random U placed on this level, as well as 10 pit traps and 10 spiked pits.

This level is no-teleport, has undiggable floors and lethe water. Stepping on any trap on this level will do some extra unspecified damage to the player even if the player doesn't trigger the trap itself, and stepping on any water square will do a random amount of damage as well as stun the player. Every time the player steps on water, the average stun length and damage done will go up (eventually dealing more than the player's maximum hit points worth of damage in a single turn), and all of these effects will still apply if the player has levitation or is flying.

Lower filler level(s): Vertigo Walls


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The upstair on this level is on the far left with the downstair on the far right. There are 10 undead activistors, 10 undead feat masters, 20 random @ and 10 random B spawned on entering the level. Also, 50 boulders as well as 50 piles of rocks are randomly placed, as well as 10 random gems. And last but not least, 50 random traps are on this level as well.

This level is no-teleport and has undiggable floors. There is no water to start with, but if any is created during the course of the game, it will be sparkling lethe water.

Goal level: Violet Carpet

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This level is no-teleport, and if water is generated by any means, it has lethe properties.

Irina is waiting in the throne room, with the Unobtainable Beauties. This throne room is also a living room, filled to the brim with random hostile @. There is a room filled with mimics on the lower right and an ADOM tension room filled with monsters of one specific, randomly-chosen type on the upper right. The f on the lower part by the secret doors are hostileporter block fungi, which start out asleep. In addition to the special room monsters, the game will also place some undead activistors, undead feat masters and additional random @ on the level.

There's a wide open plains around the map shown above; the player will appear somewhere to the right, but there's also a path around the complex (which has undiggable walls). Without wallwalking, the only entrances are on the eastern part of the complex.

This quest is also very hard to beat. See Failed Existence#Strategy for details on how to get to the nemesis and defeat it.

Messages

Warning: Parts of the quest dialogue might be disturbing. Slash'EM Extended is only a video game (NHINRL); the author of Slash'EM Extended doesn't condone or endorse the behaviour described in this quest, and it isn't her intention to offend any real-life topmodels, transvestites, activists or members of any other group of people. Amy wants all real-life people to be able to live a peaceful life, as opposed to having to fight each other.

The quest leader, Gruff Co-Worker, is very evil and mean. Most of his messages can only be seen if the player pacifies him, but even then, he shows such hostility and aggressiveness in his messages that you might as well not bother and just take the downstairs without ever speaking to him.

A user has suggested improving this page or section as follows:

"Label the messages"


This is Red Carpet, the place where you unsuccessfully tried your luck.

Gruff Co-Worker didn't want you here the last time, and this time it's probably
not gonna be any different, but you still feel you need to talk to
him...
Once again, you are back at Red Carpet.
You are back at Red Carpet.
You have an odd feeling this may be the last time you ever come here.
"I wanna scratch you, bitch."
"Get outta my sight!"
"Fuck off, we don't want your type around here!"
"You loser! Begone!"
"Stop desecrating this place with your presence!"
"I don't like you at all!"
"I hate you! I want to make you bleed!"
"Watch out or I'll make something terrible happen to you!"
"You weren't supposed to defeat Irina! You were supposed to shrivel up and die!"
"Do yourself and me a favor - jump into the canyon and don't come back!"
"WHAT? <playername>? You dare coming back?

Excuse me, but there seems to be a misunderstanding. You're not supposed
to set foot on Red Carpet ever again! Didn't I clearly tell you the last time?"
"Still around? Why don't you just commit suicide?"
"You're not giving up, huh? I swear, if you keep bugging me I'll make your
remaining life an endless misery!"
"Die, worthless creature!"
"You're never gonna make it! I'll send you back to where you came
from, and I expect you to stay there and not annoy me again!"
"I find your lack of faith disturbing. People like you are bad for
business, and now I'll send you far away from here.

Don't even think about coming back!"
"Blah. Why don't you go to Violet Carpet and meet Irina? She might just
end your miserable, worthless life. Heck, I actually hope you're stupid
enough to actually do that, because we'd then be rid of you.

So what are you waiting for now?"
"Didn't I tell you to die?"
"Just allow Irina to kill you already!"
"I really hope you get killed soon!"
"You're not even supposed to exist! You're supposed to die!"
"Irina will eradicate failures like you in her sleep."
"Your life will always be miserable no matter what you do, so why don't
you make it end already?"
"How much longer will I have to look at you worthless creature?"
"Nobody is going to help you, no matter how often you ask!"
"Nobody likes you, nobody has ever liked you and nobody will ever
like you in the future!"
"You useless failure! Get out of here!"
This is the Grand Canyon. You have to fight the urge to simply jump down.
Once again, you see the majestic Grand Canyon in the distance.
Maybe you can just jump in... it can't potentially be *that* deep...
Irina is here. You dread the upcoming meeting with her.
You still need to get to Irina.
"What... how did you get here?

Well, if you want to gain membership, you must defeat me in combat!"
"You somehow got past my co-worker, but now you'll have to best me!
Good luck, you're gonna need it!"
"Remember that this is a fight to the death! If I defeat you, I may
officially kill you."
"What? You stole my valuable treasure? How did you manage that???

Let's see if I can take it back!"
"If you are not careful, I will not be polite to you!"
"I will be rude to you if you disturb my work!"
"See if you can avoid being defeated!"
"Do you think you got what it takes?"
"If you can beat me, I'll allow you to stay alive."
"You have failed many times already. Do you think that this time
will be different?"
"No, I don't despise you. But I don't particularly care about you either."
"You're a nice little distraction."
"Maybe I'll accept you into the bunch of spectators if you're good."
"You won't actually be given membership, but if you can impress me then
I'll allow you to stay around."
You quickly steal a beautiful pair of high-heeled combat boots. They're
the prettiest that you've ever seen. Sadly, they won't ever fully
recognize you as their owner no matter what...
Irina exclaims:

"Wow. You're better than your reputation. You may stay here if you like.
But please don't unneccesarily disturb my girls. Okay?"

Then, she disappears.
Gruff Co-Worker speaks:

"Bah. You think you've bested Irina, but I know that she's laughing her
butt off right now. And now get the hell out of here at once!"
"Thief! Give that back or I'll kill you personally!"
"What? You're bragging about some 'deeds' you've accomplished?
Go away, nobody believes in those fairy tales!"
"This is impossible. A complete failure of Nature like you, a creature
that shouldn't even have been conceived in the first place, CAN'T have
that damn amulet.

Ah well, I hope you try to ascend on the wrong altar and die. Begone!"
"Fuck off you motherfucking piece of shit!"
You suddenly get a sense of premonition, or is it a deja-vu?
The path to Red Carpet may be hidden here! It's the place where Gruff Co-Worker resides,
and he's the bastard who ruined your career and caused you to become
a failed existence in the first place. You shudder at the thought of
venturing back to meet him.
You shiver as you realize once again that you might meet Gruff Co-Worker again.
"Better get out of here NOW and FOREVER before I break your neck for
stealing our silver bell!"