Topmodel

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The Topmodel is a role specific to Slash'EM Extended, which has been added in version v44. They are a melee/ranged combat class, and can be any race or alignment. Some of their features may seem disturbing, but Amy Bluescreenofdeath (creator of Slash'EM Extended) explicitly states it's meant to be fun and comedic. Also, the author doesn't try to condone or endorse the behavior shown in-game in any way. Slash'EM Extended is just a video game; NHINRL. Players who are sensitive to the subject of dietary restrictions are advised to play other roles instead.

Topmodels start the game with moderately usable equipment, the attire charm technique and some intrinsics (see below). If they are created male, they will instantly become female and identify the amulet of change in the process. However, they can use another amulet of change to revert back to male, which has some strategic implications.

Any topmodel who wears high heels is very fast, unbreathing, stealthy, telepathic, flying and warned. However, a female topmodel cannot gain these intrinsics in any other way (an exception is the amulet of ESP which still grants extra-sensory perception), and they are a very slow role (base speed 8 instead of the standard 12). Thus, taking off the starting heels is not recommended.

The Topmodel's starting pet is a dark/redguard/thieving girl, and they start with a saddle and basic riding skill which can be used on their starting pet. However, their conduct means they must not eat while satiated and not eat meat, or else they are subjected to various harmful effects. See the strategy section for details.

The Topmodel quest sees you fighting the Activist Leader for the Golden High Heels. It is also notorious for its extreme difficulty, basically forcing the player to postpone it until a complete ascension kit has been acquired.

Starting Equipment

Techniques

Topmodels gain techniques at these experience levels:

Skills

Topmodel Skills
Max Skills
Expert
Master


Gods

Main article: Religion
  • Lawful: Speedy Gonzales
  • Neutral: Dan Naginati
  • Chaotic: Kylie Lum

Topmodel rank titles

The status line shows you to be one of the following ranks when you reach the specified experience level (they are in no way meant to be offensive or humiliating):

  • XL 1-2: Sweet Girl
  • XL 3-5: Catwalk Tester
  • XL 6-9: Curved Woman
  • XL 10-13: Playboy Bunny
  • XL 14-17: Erotic Lady
  • XL 18-21: Lovely Chick
  • XL 22-25: Sexy Poser
  • XL 26-29: ANTM Semi-Finalist
  • XL 30: ANTM Finalist

Strategy

The Topmodel has a relatively hard early game, with the knife being a weak weapon that should be replaced by a better melee weapon. Riding combined with a polearm weapon may be a good choice. Using their starting rifle, topmodels may quickly take down dangerous opponents, but their create ammo technique doesn't arrive until they reach XL 10, so they will eventually run out of bullets.

It is a bad idea to take off or otherwise lose the starting high heels, since the player will lose a lot of intrinsics and can't get them back unless they become male (with an amulet of change, for example) or put on another pair. The loss of the very fast attribute is especially crippling; without it, topmodels only have a base speed of 8, which is even slower than the already slow undead slayer, courier and similar roles. Monsters will be very quick to surround and kill you, and outrunning them will also be much harder. Even a very fast topmodel only has an average speed of about 13.3, which is worse than most "fast" characters (speed 16), and also just slightly better than a "fast" undead slayer (speed 12.5).

If the starting pet girl defeats enough monsters, she will grow up into a woman that does more damage, which can then grow up again to become a lady that does even more damage. However, a topmodel may also use the attire charm technique to acquire new human(oid) pets. This also requires the player to wear some sort of heels, so this is another reason to protect the starting pair at all costs.

Some of the intrinsics associated with the topmodel's heels will prove to be very useful. Warning shows almost all monsters as they move closer, flying allows the player to avoid traps, water and lava, and unbreathing means choking and drowning YASDs can't happen. If a blindfold or towel is acquired, the player will also get to use intrinsic telepathy, and stealth helps when trying to avoid dangerous foes.

However, topmodels have a code of conduct to follow. They may not eat while satiated and are supposed to be vegetarian; breaking these rules will cause an alignment penalty and subject the player to a random detrimental effect. Which may be confusion, stun, blindness, hallucination, paralysis or in extreme cases, food poisoning (even if the food was otherwise safe to eat). Also, running around satiated will abuse all of strength, dexterity, constitution and wisdom, and if a topmodel actually overeats and chokes, they will suffer from an additional big alignment penalty!

On the other hand, a topmodel can go hungry for much longer. Being hungry makes them burn nutrition at half the normal rate, being weak reduces it to one quarter, fainting reduces it to one eighth and being actually fainted causes nutrition to burn at 1/16 of the normal rate. All of that also works for the extra hunger caused by rings of hunger, conflict and regeneration. This allows topmodels to go without food for much longer than other characters (beware: this does not work in real life - NHINRL), and they exercise wisdom while hungry or worse, strength while weak or worse, and dexterity while fainting/fainted. No attributes are abused while hungry or worse. There is also a warning if the player is about to starve. If they actually do starve, topmodels still die normally unless they lifesave, though.

The Topmodel quest is a very hard quest, teeming with transvestite enemies and obnoxious monsters called activists. Transvestites are dangerous due to their chance of spawning with potentially lethal attack wands, as well as their melee weapon and kick attacks. Activists are even worse; in fact, they're an especially nasty Slash'EM Extended monster that uses random gaze attacks including, but not limited to, death, disease, disenchanting, hallucination, disintegration and petrification. This means it might be a good idea to be blindfolded on the quest and use telepathy/warning to detect enemies; however, activists also stun you in melee and steal items. And if that wasn't enough, they are also metallivores and lithivores, allowing them to eat most projectiles a player might want to use on them. Finally, every activist always gets at least one potentially nasty scroll that will be used to thwart the player's progress. However, activists are vulnerable to instakills from poison, disintegration, wands of death and cockatrice corpses.

Beating the Activist Leader quest nemesis is a real chore. He/she is guarded by several roomfuls of nasty monsters, many of which may spawn with random offensive items including wands of death. In order to reach him/her, the player might actually need a complete ascension kit, and the nemesis itself is basically an activist on steroids, using the same attack pattern but with at least 10 guaranteed random scrolls, covetous AI, very fast speed, good AC and magic resistance, and doing much more damage with all attacks. Unlike standard activists, the leader is resistant to petrification, death magic, sleep, disintegration and fire, so most instakill options are off the table. Freezing a pool and zapping a wand of fire at the leader while it is standing on the ice may actually be the best strategy, but it might destroy the quest artifact.

Origin

The Topmodel is based on this work of fanfiction (written in German), which itself is based on a TV show.