User:Wikid/Nutritional Monsters

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Revision as of 06:54, 3 August 2019 by Wikid (talk | contribs) (Happy Meal™)
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Flicked from the ranges of VoR's Hallucinatory Bestiary, we bring you some Nutritional Monsters.

Fries With That

Fries With That have a nutrition increasing seduction attack. For each armour item that is removed, nutrition is increased by 300. The seduction dialogue is simple: "You want fries with that?" A complete set of armour (boots / undergarment / shirt / cloak / gloves / helmet) implies 1800 nutrition, sufficient to take the player character from Hungry to nearly Oversatiated.

Fries With That %
Template Blue jelly
Attacks passive seduction
Alignment 0 (neutral)
Frequency 0 (Not randomly generated)

Q: What does the Physisicist with a job say to the Physicist without a job?
A: 'You want fries with that?'

Apocryphal

Carnivorous Lentil

Legend has it this innocent pulse was bitten by a radioactive worm in a mage's kitchen. Fortunately for sentientkind, it did not acquire motility.

Fries With That %
Template Purple worm
Attacks Passive (Bite 2d8), Passive (Engulf 1d10 digest)
Speed 0
Alignment 0 (neutral)
Frequency 0 (Not randomly generated)

The person who knows one thing and does it better than anyone else, even if it only be the art of raising lentils, receives the crown he merits. If he raises all his energy to that end, he is a benefactor of mankind and its rewarded as such.

Og Mandino

Happy Meal™

Unwitting adventurers stumble on the Happy Meal™. The figurine is nifty, but the memory is shifty.

Happy Meal™ %
Template Mind flayer
Attacks passive ((int drain+2d1)*3, amnesia)
Speed 0
Alignment 0 (neutral)
Frequency 0 (Not randomly generated)
Drops Random figurine

My entire life I have always remembered everything I've eaten for the first time, I remember where I was, when it was, who bought it and how it tasted.

Lucy Zee, Stuff.co.nz

Veal Currie

This spicy delight is generated asleep on a rock, but is awoken and aggravated by contact. In the event it can be scared away, this generates YAFM "It's the Flight of the Veal Currie!"

Veal Currie %
Template Blue dragon
Speed 15
Alignment 0 (neutral)
Frequency 0 (Not randomly generated)
The Veal Currie Is female
Can fly

Smell that? You smell that? Napalm, son. Nothing else in the world smells like that. I love the smell of napalm in the morning.

F.F.Coppola, Apocalypse Now